Facebook Always Knows What You Did Last Night

by Michael Millar

Social Media week has come to Glasgow and promises to be a great celebration of how pillars of the digital age such as Facebook and Twitter have changed many of our lives. Events such as ‘Virtual Wine Tasting’ and ‘Audio Book Creation’ were certainly eye-catching enough for me to consider traveling from my Edinburgh home. However I was, sadly, unable to attend. This was because the beginning of Social Media Week coincides with the end of something I may need to recover from, Edinburgh Freshers Week.

A damned fine one too. In fact at the time of writing my hangover feels roughly like my insides jumped out of my body then fell down the stairs. But somewhere between the gigantic queues, cheap shots, and my inability to remember the rest, it occurred to me that I could still use Freshers Week to celebrate Social Media. Not just Freshers Week mind you, most every night out has been completely revolutionised by Facebook. It’s simple to find out “Who’s game for (insert club name here) tonight?” With news feeds pouring with friends to go out and get completely razzled with. Where do we end up going?

Most every club in any city has used Facebook as the centrepiece of their PR system. Of course there’s still plenty of use for those freezing members of club staff who have to hand out leaflet after leaflet to get you into their doors but Facebook proves to be a much better alternative to people. They can follow the clubs they like and find out what’s going down at that club. As opposed to walking through the streets politely rejecting PR fliers for clubs they have no interest in.

Most every day on my profile I find something notifying me that I’ve got to get out tonight, throw on my dancin’ shoes and strive to jive but as annoying as that can be sometimes I certainly appreciate it’s usefulness in getting me into the door. Then comes the aftermath which Facebook’s got covered too.

Just think, In order to see a photograph of yourself on a night out even ten years ago you would have to have somebody lug around a large camera. Then you would have to pay to develop the film within the camera. Then the only people who could see your captured moment of drunken shame would be those who could be around the physical copy of the photograph. Facebook, as well as great advancements in digital photography, has made this a completely distant memory. Photos can be uploaded seconds after they have been taken and they are free to be viewed by all who would happen to be interested in your buffoonery. Too often do people dread the idea of being “Tagged” in photos from a boozy adventure.

Most every group of friends who populate a nightclub will at least have one member carrying a spy sized camera to remind you that you did indeed do what you thought couldn’t possibly have happened. Even that’s not enough to be fearful of. There are those sneaky paid photographers out there with high quality cameras to go around and flaunt their obvious sobriety as they capture your most idiotic moments. They reveal to you that no matter how much you tried to look great before the night out, You will always look like a moron.

So while I sit and try to assist my hangover in a noise free environment and await the oncoming battering of my ego I must say that if the hundreds of adverts and small prints don’t convince you to drink more responsibly, then perhaps that little red notification flag just may.

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One Response

  1. Probably the worst thing about social media is the dreaded photo-tag. Countless times I’ve gone “aw fer god sake” whilst still half-drunkenly browsing facebook the day after a night out. Then again, it has it’s upsides. Photo bombing a couple pulling anyone?

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